How does one learn to dissociate emotional suffering from physical suffering, one might ask.

I don’t mean, does feeling sad make a bruise appear on your knee, obviously. What I’m referring to is that deep, throbbing ache in your chest, the constricted feeling and tightness of the airways. These physical ailments seem to come with a broken heart, I’m learning. I literally had to reach back and unhook my bra today while driving on the freeway incase it was the culprit to the dizzying feeling of not being able to take a full breath. It was not the bra, as you may have guessed. It was the emotional wave of pain surging in my heart. It comes and goes, is up and down. Quite literally a physical roller coaster. Have you ever noticed, when experiencing heartbreak, that sometimes the ups and downs are so rapid that you go to cry and tears haven’t even been summoned before the splitting pain ceases? That has been happening to me also.

So, how does one cope with the coming and going, the up and the down?
I have yoga, thank goodness…a journal…a phenomenal mother, and girlfriends…and dreams of a future full of joy and happiness.

So I suppose, after coming full circle on this post, the answer is that there is no way to really dissociate the two types of suffering. They are, in fact, one single suffering. Breathing, coping and envisioning the positive outcome is all you can really do. Namaste.

 

Further Proof

Further proof, I tell you (yes, the statement is so true it deserved repetition)!

I was struck – and by struck I mean I felt like I had to sneeze, and then suddenly I was full blown taken out by a head cold, zero to sixty in a matter of twenty minutes – down sick yesterday and took a spoonful of honey in the evening, and a spoonful of honey this morning…and voila, no I’m not ALL BETTER, but I’m CERTAINLY on the road to recovery!

La la la, a spoonful of honey makes the coldbugs go away, coldbugs go away!

Still resting and drinking lots of liquids, but the honey is still most certainly the best trick in my book for kicking a bug straight away.

Letting Go of the Little Things

I’m sincerely concerned with how easily I get worked up by the smallest offenses. For instance, passive-aggressive behavior just about sends me into anxiety overload. I am not an angry person, but repetitive behaviors of passive-aggression just make me boil over. How do I avoid the surge of cortisol that I suffer each time this occurs then? Because these offenses are simply OUT of my control. That is what goads us most, I think; the fact that we are utterly helpless to the treatment, and with my personal oversensitivity to it making me a bright red target, is what makes it so detrimental. I’m a sitting duck, to be honest. My heatedly emotional reactions seem to perpetuate the harassment (and I call it harassment because passive-aggressive people sometimes don’t mean to be redundant in their hurtfulness; others are acting with total intention).
So, what to do? Should I keep fighting, and thus let the passive-aggressive person in my life continue to make me crazy with rage, or should I refuse the rage altogether? I am not a person who has ever really had “rage” in my vocabulary. Until I identified my allergy to passive-aggression. To people’s snide comments, or silent treatment for that matter, and all the purposeful facial expressions, tone of voice and prodding actions are triggers.

I guess my resolution in this case is going to have to be confrontation (which is my kryptonite, by the way). In the meantime, breathing through the anguished images of what this confrontation might look like is what I’ll do. That and trying to avoid dread and worry, because in the end it’s just words being spoken.

Perhaps I need to take a page out of the standard easy going person’s handbook. There should be one of those.

Peace 🙂

I Simply Cannot Say This Enough

ROOM TEMPERATURE HONEY!

When you feel the onset of any type of bug, be it cold, flue or cough, please try my most favorite home remedy. Over summer I was suffering from a terrible bout with bronchitis. I was told by a dear friend that as soothing as honey may be in tea, once it’s heated it loses its medicinal properties. A spoonful of room temperature honey, however, is ridden with helpful medicinal properties. Like a natural antibiotic! A few weeks ago I sensed a cold coming on, so I began my morning and evneing spoonfuls of honey. Three days later I was left with nothing but wintery sniffles. Granted, some colds might run their course that speedily, but I’m always taken down by a cold for at least a week. This was miraculous. I attribute my fast recovery to the honey. Check it out.

Thank Gosh it’s ________!!!

Hello Beautiful World,

I just have to say, I was almost about to say, “Thank Gosh it’s Friday!!!” Then I remembered, I’m a college student working in retail, my Friday is practically nonexistent. So, I’m liberating us from being tied to only ONE day about which we can say, “WOOHOO THANK GOSH IT’S _____!!!” Instead, you take that blank and do whatever you gosh darn well please with it. I’m freeing you from four days of effort, chugging away to make it to Friday, then speeding through blissful Saturday and Sunday before placing a big load of daunting dread back onto poor Monday. Let’s redesign this whole scenario.

For instance, tomorrow just so happens to be my “Friday” and not even in the general sense. I switched out of my Sunday shift so I could go on a (MUCH NEEDED) spa day retreat with one of my best girlfriends. That means I will work tomorrow, be off Sunday, and embark upon my last quarter of College on monday. Sooooo, sort of like a Friday. But that’s just it…I am not going to let the societal standard of “work, work, work, work, work, play, play, begin again” get me down. I’m going to be so bold as to say, “Thank Gosh it’s TODAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” Okay, maybe more exclamation points than were necessary, but you get the picture.

Yeah, I have to work today. Yes, I also have only a few more days of freedom before a very challenging quarter begins. But I refuse to be sucked into the black hole of dread that has become a trained cycle in our daily lives. The rush to make it to Friday, then the anxiety that the weekend is passing too quickly, followed by the dread of Monday’s arrival and beginning it all again. Let’s get off that ride, right now.

In a perfect world the weekday would be three days long and the weekend would be four. And perhaps there would be days in between spacing out the workweek, or perhaps not. That’s my perfect world, off the top of my head, but everyone’s will look different. So perhaps it’s safe to say in a perfect world everyone would man their own schedule. Sounds a bit like chaos, yes? Well, bear with me. Let’s hypothetically create our own worlds. Let’s boldly take the reins and find reason to be “fourteen exclamation points excited” about this very day, this very moment. Unless there’s a boatload of stress, anxiety and foreboding resting on your shoulders for some big court date, foreign commute, huge meeting…is there really any reason to be so filled with dread? I think not. Hopefully, seeing as it is Friday today and for most of the working world that signals near freedom, this will be an easier pill to swallow right now.

Make this your goal, if you want, for Monday. Make an effort to meet that day with calm and respect. Think of this coming week (which will be challenging for me, considering the first day of my final quarter commences Monday) as a gift, an opportunity to alter our thinking when it comes to the standard “work week.” If you commute on public transit, perhaps bringing a new magazine or book, or listening to a playlist of music you’d typically listen to when getting ready to go out on a Saturday night. Change the way you feel about Mondays…and Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays. Think about what excites you on a moment to moment basis. Making it home in the evening for the big slobbery greeting from your black lab? Then popping in the DVD you didn’t finish watching over the weekend and having a glass of wine? Excellent. Maybe it’s lunch because you’re going to treat yourself to your favorite. Or perhaps it’s Wednesday when you get to take your favorite exercise class. My challenge to you is not only to identify those excitements, but to avoid the sense of urgency to get there. Enjoy that something in your life is giving you that electrified feeling of thrill! That feeling of, “Oh I can’t wait for that,” is a blessing.

So step two will be to identify that feeling and then cherish it in the moment, take it with you, bring that feeling into all the things you have to do in the meantime. Typing up documents at work, going to the grocery store, all of these mundane activities are the carriers that lead you to things of extreme bliss. Because if everything in your life were extremely blissful, nothing would stand out, and even the extremely blissful would become mundane.

I bought a 2012 calendar yesterday (for $13.99 which I felt like was a splurge, in the realm of calendars, just saying…) and it is called “Emotional Freedom – Liberate Yourself from Negative Emotions and Transform Your Life.” RIGHT? How could I not buy that. So, I will leave you today with January 2012’s nugget of wisdom, printed over a pastel image of blushing roses: “View your emotions in a non-ordinary way: as vehicles for transformation rather than simply as feelings that make you happy or miserable. Expect them to test your heart; that’s the point. What you go through – what we all go through – has a greater purpose. Always, the imperative of emotional freedom is for the love in us to evolve.”

Calling All Yogis

If you are a Home Yoga Practitioner, you most likely are always looking for new practice material. Please show my favorite instructor some love. FLOWETRY is an incredible DVD that just arrived on my doorstep yesterday (that’s been highly anticipated since I pre-ordered it in October) and I’m thrilled with the content. There are 90 minutes of material to choose from, either push play, or build your own practice based on what you’re in the mood for (even if it’s only the stretch & relax portion, that sequence is incredible for the body, so cooling and calming). The DVD is worth every penny, and practicing with Jennifer is a joy. Here is the link where you can find FLOWETRY:

http://www.livwhole.com/buy

Namaste!