Lately I have been having experiencing what I can only classify as “intense presence.” Lucid dreaming. Dejavu. Manifesting. Intuitive premonitions. Energy flowing freely. I’ve felt, at times, like I’m watching a silent film, the soundtrack to which plays almost perfectly timed in my mind. It may sound strange, as it’s an experience hard to capture and express verbally, but it feels natural and comfortable. To be frank I keep wondering when it’ll suddenly go away, as quickly as it came.
There are times for us all when we’re more or less tapped into our lives, not just our lives but the rhythm of our lives. The pulse of it. When we’re tapped into our intuition. This is one of those times for me. I find the deeper we sink into these spells when they come, the easier it is to lodge ourselves in a more permanent state of connectedness.
As of late I have been having lucid dreams, dreams that then penetrate my daily activities. I’ll be talking with someone at the market, or standing and people watching in the sun, and suddenly I’ll be overwhelmed with a portion of a dream I had. I’ll be driving through the tunnel and suddenly feel a dream-related wave of dejavu, a profound moment of clarity where two worlds collide. It’s been unearthly, to say the least.
But what I find most intriguing about this (other than how bloody fun it’s been!) is the notion I’ve extracted from the whole experience. The notion of “intense presence.” What does it mean to you to be intensely present? For some it might just mean unplugging from electronics, work, social media, entertainment and being physically and mentally there. Interacting with family. Making eye contact. Enjoying a meal. Hiking up a hill beneath a canopy of trees.
For others it might mean something a little different. It might mean moving past the mental and physical state and permeating the emotional state, perhaps even the spiritual state. Presence of the astral body. Cosmic connectedness. It might mean dreaming so vividly it’s sometimes hard to differentiate sleep visions from things that happened last week.
The latter is illustrative of what I’m living these days. Did I mention it was fun?
The past few days have been frightfully windy (disrupting my Vata and destabilizing me to the extreme, all the more apt to getting lost in my dreamy head and flitting around with neither rhyme nor reason) and we are coming up on the full moon (an energy I feel strongly every month, but more so this March moon). The ungrounded nature of my existence has lent even more fascination to the unambiguous and direct whisperings of the Divine Mother. Dream whisperings and waking thoughts mingling, blending lazily like watercolors, vague enough to be pretty but visible enough to be interpreted.
So what’s the point, you ask? (Pardon my putting words in your mouth but sometimes I wonder the same myself, what’s your point Sara? Land your plane…). I suppose it’s that we have the capacity to be far more present, intensely present, in our own lives than we ever thought possible. I know this because I’m experiencing it. And I believe deeply that it can only grow. We check out not just as a coping mechanism, but by nature. I think it’s been an evolution. I imagine the hurriedness of the world, technology and modern advancements, busy jobs and the art slash epidemic of multi-tasking, has given birth to the casually checked out state of most people nowadays. We go to yoga class and tune into our higher brain, we get in sync with our bodies, but then we walk out and boom…there’s that chaotic world again. Can we keep our cool when we pull out onto the busy road? Can we stay present once the voicemails start coming in and the to-do list materializes before our savasana-glazed eyes?
I don’t know about you, but I often can’t.
So what’s an earnest human being to do? What’s a mindful yogi to do?
I know this is totally shocking coming from a novice 25 year old, but I don’t have the answer for you 😉 Even in the handful of lives I know I’ve lived, I haven’t found the answer. What I’ve found is a feeling. A sensation. It’s the sensation that’s been suffusing my existence, both sleeping and waking, for weeks now. As you may know, I believe we are energetic beings within physical bodies. I believe the body to be our sacred little vessel, the container for our life-force. I believe, because of this, that we can actively tap into the flow of what we truly are. A thread of awareness, a stream of energy, a buzzing aura that can attract and deflect and absolutely radiate. I believe, with practice (perhaps several lives of practice), we can live in this state. Sure, life in all its forms will still exist for us, we’ll still get stuck in traffic and have arguments with our loved ones, we’ll still bleed and cry and sweat, but we’ll be operating on a different level. Vibrating on a higher frequency. Hyper-aware at all times of what and who we truly are, holding that awareness in open palms, letting it wax and wane with the pulls and tugs of the Universe. We can be beings of light, spiritual warriors, in a human world.
If you want proof of how possible this is, I have a slice of it for you right here. So I’ve been writing this piece for about thirty to forty-five minutes. I have gotten up a number of times (can’t sit still syndrome) to wash the dishes, further muse over this essay, to practice some handstands, to get more water…but, as I’m wrapping this piece up, I get the inclination to click over and check my email (in true, short attention span form). What has landed lightly in my inbox? A newsletter from Yoga Journal entitled “Embody the Present.”
What’s even more Whoa is what the newsletter said. It started with, “Our culture values productivity and speed. Before we know it, we’re embroiled in a perpetual battle with time, missing out on our connections to our deeper selves and to others,” and ended with, “Let go of the need to achieve more. When you can stop grasping, even if only for a little while, you can access that state of flow, remain in the present, and enjoy and harvest the time that is available to you.”
I mean…is that not precisely what I’ve been writing about? I’m telling you. This is what has been happening to me, for weeks now. Divine parallels. I’m thinking something, really thinking hard on it, and boom – it manifests before my eyes. I emit an energy, backed by spirit and surrender, and boom – the Universe presents the mirror energy. I have a dream, vivid and sharp, and boom – the next day my waking world curls in around the same sensation, embracing what my soul has been up to as my body slept.
This is what’s been happening for and to me and it’s what can happen for and to you too, if you so desire. A focused mind, an open heart and a pinprick sharp intention are the only tools needed to get in touch with this fluid existence. It’s already inside of you, it’s inside of me. It’s the gently moving waters of real life. Not earthly life, but the life energy that was present long before humans ever walked this planet; the same energy that will go on long after we’ve all departed. The intangible, untouchable, fathomless infinity. That is what we are made of, and all you have to do is look within and see your reflection…dip your fingers into the waters, of true identity. Wade in ankle deep and let the current just carry you.